Thank you for giving me the opportunity to try to be friends. I am very grateful for it and will not do anything to mess up our friendship. I have changed. I got back most of the person that you met when we first started dating and am even better. The best news is that I am going to be even better, too. I am honored to be your friend and show you just that.
Does that mean I have given up on our love? Absolutely not. "Never give up on someone you can't go a day without thinking about." come to mind. That doesn't mean you need to run for the hills and fear that I will start stalking you or such. I am not going to chase you. You will either see that I am still the one for you and come back on your own, or your won't. As for me, I BELIEVE you will see just that.
I had a dream with you in it, but it wasn't a pleasant one. Much like Scrooge seeing a possible future, this one was you and I apart, meeting again ten years in the future. You were married, with one child and another on the way. It was clear the lover you had was abusive. I asked about it and it lead to a fight where you stormed out and I was left crying. I reject that future and
I am putting the negative behind me. I am sure I will have my moments when it will come knocking on the door of my heart, especially the longer it goes where you and I are not together as lovers, but I will banish it and over time it will get easier. Afterall, I really am not a negative leaning person, and I have always been one to believe. I am "seeing my past to let it go", but not before learning from it. I've already learned so much of what I have done stems from my past. No more though.
While I was in Washington, D.C., today, rambling around, I saw two different duos of older people. The first was a couple, both with grey hair but still very much in love. I have always believed that would be us one day. At the end of a life well-lived, we would still walk hand-in-hand beside one another. The other duo were also grey-haired, but they were not together, they just happened to get on the Metro train at the same time. They both were lonely - you could see it in their eyes. I opt to reject that view of our future. I believe in time you will, too. Belief is the path to taking control of your own destiny.
I counted 31 total Kia's in my travels today. D.C. doesn't have too many, at least not where I was. I didn't get any signs of you, except for a decision that stole into my heart telling me to believe and focus on believing.
The high of my day was you - you telling me that we could try to be friends. Friends are at least a start. It's a start that I see leading to me asking you that all important question: Will you, Princess, marry me?
The believer,
MNP