No facts today. No learning. No special information. I got the message today loud and clear and in striking high definition. You don't want me. You don't believe we were meant to be. So it goes and so must I. I must go on. I must live. I must survive the best I can.
Things went well enough at the distillery, and it was a good time, but then when we stopped for a little something to eat, you told me about all the things you are doing with a "friend" that some part of my broken heart is certain is more than simply a friend. Then, cue the waterworks, the tears and the emotions.
I meant what I said because my heart knows it to be true. No, for me, it's not just a process that I have to work through and magically I will come out on the other end over you. I don't need more time. You are not my first serious relationship, but I never felt this way for anyone else and never will I again. Some truths you can touch and smell, others you only know with your heart, so this one is for me.
It was odd that our tour guide was also named Alexa. I continue to have signs and symbols confirming my truth. I counted 19 Kia's on Thursday, 17 yesterday and 40 (my age) today.
Never fear, as I said to you, I get the message and I will leave you be. Still, this is part of my way of dealing, coping, being able to continue to live. I still will ask each night, will you marry me?
Heartbroken,
MNP