Dear Alexa: I took this picture today when I was out for a walk, and it illustrated beautifully, to me anyway, the journey I am on now. The road lies ahead and I must follow where it goes. It's a lonely road without you, but the only other choice is to cease the journey. Although there is attractiveness in the latter, I will not willingly go to the ending early. I've been reading a variety of texts of late and came across a statistic that about 1/5 of humanity lives without electric lights. Interesting. I guess you could take that a step further though and how much of humanity is living unenlightened lives? I imagine it's vastly more than 1/5 of the population. I am trying to combat that with my variety of reading and educational pursuits. The best gift the last two crappy years have given me is that most fear has left me. Yes, there are still things that I fear of certain things, but the fear of death is gone. For I have no one who depends upon me in any way. 2013 took you and Blue from me. He was totally dependent on me, you were in certain ways. Even though I would prefer you both be back with me, I have to look at the positive. I can take risks now that I wouldn't have when you were both with me. Well, creative people can sure be divas. I've tried to get two small articles done on artistic people. They both seem to believe they deserve more than a small article and seem to have boycotted the idea of any article. I don't get it. I am a creative individual with my writing and other avenues, and I am grateful for any press. I think that may be endemic of our society at large - that sense of entitlement. We think everything should be handed to us and be easy to obtain. The truth is nothing worth having comes easy, that goes for career achievement to relationships. I have better hopes for the article I am to write about a horsewoman for the end of the month. I rode a horse at the barn last Saturday that I deeply love. She was mostly a good girl, even though she was freaked a bit by the wind, but I stayed on and we worked through it together. That's my favorite thing about working with horses, that bond you develop. I don't know if I will ride her again this weekend or someone else, but it feels so good to be riding again. The Little Library for our community is still being considered. I was very glad to hear that because it's a great thing for the community. I am in the middle of a kindness challenge currently. Those are awesome to do. I love to see the look and attitude of others change when you do something kind for them. I counted 53 Kia's last Saturday (#10 looked like yours, but #15 was you. I wonder where you were headed), 58 on Sunday, 31 on Monday, 23 on Tuesday, 54 on Wednesday and just 5 today. While we are on the subject of kindness, now that I appreciate every kindness you ever gave me. I always have opted to focus on those rather than the negative. It is in those kind moments that you showed your love and your best self. I love you for all of you still and still ask: will you marry me? |