The rain slips down over my windows and obscures anything that the inky blackness has already not taken. This dreary night, my thoughts turn as ever they do to you. I wonder if you are well and hope that happiness is in your heart.
I thought of you when reading about sunflowers. I know you loved them, your favorite, and I wish their superpowers were enough to bring you back to me, but alas, I know they cannot. They are amazing though, as they appear to be able to clean up radioactive soil. You can read more here:
http://www.loe.org/shows/segments.html?programID=11-P13-00030&segmentID=2
They may not have the power to heal a hurt, but they may have the power to save us from ourselves.
I find myself again facing a health issue. For the past 2 months, whenever I eat or lay down, I have severe abdominal pain, nausea and have vomited some as a result. I have been losing weight and sleep in equal doses and find myself tired much of the time. My doctor thought it might be a UT infection since I had white cells in my urine, but the antibiotic did not help, so I go for a CT scan on Friday. Not looking forward to drinking the liquid barium sulfate, but am looking forward to getting some answers.
My New Orleans Saints are having as rough a year football-wise as I am heart-wise. I wish I was there though, back home, the city I adore almost as much as you. At least there would be adequate distraction there from misery.
I have seen Kia's since last I wrote, but I have quit counting them. I don't need to count them anymore. I still see the signs of you, but I am not mentioning them anymore either. I have been focusing so much on meditating and getting in touch with my higher self and where I want to be on this journey of the rest of my life. I still love you as much as I have every other day of my life and I still ask every night: Will you marry me?
Hopeful and whole (even if you never come back),
MNP