Did you know that about 35% of people who use personal ads are in fact married? I am really stunned by that number. I guess I don't have the mind of a cheater at all. I have never cheated on anyone I've date though I have been cheated on by others. It's totally wrong in my book. If you are no longer interested in your partner, then let them know and move on. So . . .if you are planning to start dating again, you might find that information interesting.
I confess that I worry you are already looking for someone new and that you have put me firmly in your past. Perhaps that is the truth. A truth that I need to at least consider, and believe me, I have tried. I have tried desperately to get over you these past months since you left because I would be happier, but there would be no truth in that happiness, thus I remain.
I get asked a lot why I keep loving you and the truth is, I simply can't stop. I believe you are my truelove. I've come to accept that you don't feel that way. Neither of us is right and neither of us is wrong. And yet we are both right and wrong. It's one of those lovely mysteries of living. You have to go with it and accept.
I have come to realize that I do not fear being alone. I don't miss the togetherness of being with anybody. I just miss all of those things with you. I have come to accept that I will live my life alone. I will die alone unless perchance you were to change your mind one day. If not, that's the way it will be. I don't want to be with anyone else. There will be sad days in my life, but my entire life won't be sad. Once I am recovered from this surgery, I will continue to evolve and throw myself into new projects and endeavors.
I counted Kia's today that equaled your age - 34. While reading a book, there was a tale of a man, who as a boy was fetching something for his neglectful and abusive father. He was just six years old and was hit by a car while crossing the road. Although you were slightly older, it was just like what happened to you.
Two weeks from tonight I will be in a hospital bed, and I won't be able to write you a letter as I have all these days. I love you, Alexa, always have, always will. I hope you can accept that and know that I will not try to change your mind, that I am not to feared or avoided. If you don't love me that's your reality and I accept it. My reality is that I want