So here I am all alone on my first Valentine's Day since you left me. As a romantic at heart, it has been ever so hard for me not to have you to be there to give something to you, to spend time with you, to exchange I love you's. I think back to a few short years ago when we had a Valentine's celebration at your house where we cooked together. Do you remember being there and making the French fish dish I had together? I had hoped that would be one of many dinners we would make together over the years. I still hold on to some
hope that it might be, maybe with a delay in between, but that there will be a future where you love me again.
I tried, as best I could, to ignore the significance of the day. It won't do me any good to think of you, especially not on a day so charged with love. So instead, I focused on my work, my writing and little else. That has rather become my life now - work, courses, reading and writing. I can't say that I am happy with it, but it is the best I can hope for without you here.
I want to let you know that I will forever love the kind and wonderful spirit you showed to me. I love that woman who could love so openly, freely and completely without caring what anyone else in the world thought of her choice of love. That was more than I ever could have hoped for or truly deserved. Thank
you for showing me that side of you.
I saw 17 total Kia's today in my limited time out. I guess it is appropriate that I would have so many signs of you today, Valentine's Day. I saw a couple getting married on television, and the bride's name was Alexandra. I saw a new story about a cheerleader suing, and her name was Alexa. I had four SPAM messages, one talking about an Alexandra and the other three all supposedly from Alexa. There was a skier on they Olympics when I turned it on, and her name was Alexandra. To my mind, that is the universe telling me that you are my soulmate, my one true love. I don't know what your thoughts are, but I know that
for now, you have decided to not be with me, and I respect that.
I still will hold to my hope, the hope that keeps my heart beating, that you will come back to me. I long for that day when I can ask you to marry me. I only ask that you don't completely harden your heart against
me.
Happy Valentine's Day,
MNP